Being apart

Now, as you can see, I am quite smitten with this awesome man! There is this saying: 'Over the wall with sokkies and all'...... We'll guess what, that is me. My world has been turned upside down in a matter of 2 weeks. And the only regret I have is that it is hurting my daughter. No, not a regret, just hurting for her part. My husband, well that's a totally different story. He is a very strong-willed person and I have always been told what to do and when to do it by him. If I had dared to do things differently then, I would hear it and also I would hear that I am good enough. I have been verbally abused for years! But, the biggest thing for me was that the things that I loved dearly in life, was made out as petty stuff. I was contained in a box where he wanted me. And so, when I told him that it is over, he was dumbstruck! How on earth can little old me pluck up the courage to do something as life-changing like this? Not me, not this little contained, not good enough girl. But you know, I am NOT that contained little girl....... I am a person in own right! I have passions, needs, life! And when I am with my'cuz' he ignites the very core of me!!!!! I feel like I am all I can be! Vibrant, sexy, loved (oh sooooo loved)! I don't have to stand back for everybody or everything! When I hear this man talking on his phone(doing business) my heart swells with pride for him! He is professional, to the point about what he wants, and when he works, he works damn hard!!! I can see his eyes light up when he speaks about a project, and I know that he is living his passion. I want to share that with him! Be there when things are smooth sailing, and when he has problems with whatever....... My heart belongs to this man! I only feel one heartbeat, that of ours together. Even when we are in each others arms our selective hearts beat with the same rythem! I am keeping this diary so that one day, we can show our kids what happend...... And they will understand why it happened! If your soulmate is out there (and believe me they are) you will meet him/her. When you least expect too!